Support, but at what cost?

It's funny how you try to leave and THAT'S when a lot of the supporters come out. That's when they all want to help or pass things around for you, OR, best one yet, act like you were their best friend when in actuality, they didn't speak to you maybe once or twice.

As I stated in a comment on my very first blog, I don't want pity, I don't want someone's charity, HOWEVER, I was asking for help. I offered things that I could to make money for this cause, I wanted to show that, I was willing to WORK for the help I was offered. Instead it turns into me leaving the one program that I loved more then life it seemed, and my FEW friends who were honestly being friends.

I suppose when your honest and up front about your intentions, people don't want anything to do with what you have to offer. Maybe just maybe, I should start lying and that would get the things done. ARE YOU KIDDING ME, if I have to stoop that low to get help I don't want OR need it. What gratification would there be to it if I lied to the ones of you who cared enough to follow me. I would have gotten what I wanted, like the Janel woman, but would it have been worth it? Would losing my babies, my husband, my friends be worth all of that? I don't think so. I was raised that if you have to lie for something then you don't really need it that bad anyways.

There have been one or two that have came out of the wood works that are offering help, but they are also (some not all) the ones who never spoke to me before all of this came up.

For those who were/are worried about me I am forever grateful to you. Your caring attitudes are what keep me coming back here. I am thankful that God blessed me with your friendship!!!